I wrote three travel pieces not too long ago, check them out as you start to plan spring/summer trips!
~ elina x
My New (and first!) Single is streaming everywhere! West Coast, here I come!
As someone who has moved around a lot, many of my songs have themes of travel, adventure, and longing. This song was inspired by an urge to hit the road, which was inspired by a breakup, which then inspired romanticizing far away places, and the way that we’ll feel if we ever get there. Like a lot of my music, this was a family affair. My Dad produced and tracked the song. My Uncle Mike (one of the best sax players in the country) completes the tune with playful melodies and killer riffs. This song has been a road trip in itself. My vocal was recorded in Niagara, the rest of the song was tracked and produced in Singapore, the sax part recorded in Toronto, and it is now being released in Dublin. I hope you enjoy my first single, West Coast!
Stream now on Spotify.
Support independent music! Purchase this track here.
It’s hard to believe it has been one full year since I graduated University! So much has happened in that time. Many amazing things, some hard things. Leaving Canada, travelling, exploring Europe, falling in love with Dublin. So much musical creation, digging in to the music scene here. Seeing with my own eyes what the musical life entails. A Diploma in Songwriting from BIMM Dublin. An EP on the way. Gaining respect for those who spend their lives in the service industry. Leaving that industry to focus on myself and my art, and gaining even more respect for self-employed entrepreneurs, especially artist. Manifesting a wild summer ahead. A Charity Gig & Single. Lots of Guinness. And finally, Its been full of making new connections, as well as nurturing old ones.
It was my first year really being on my own in The Real World, without answering to an institution, without family around. There have, of course, been challenges along the way. All I had was myself, and I really had to trust myself. I learned a lot about what I might want from this crazy, wonderful life. Truth be told, I still really have no idea but I can’t say I’m in a rush to figure it out.
I think it important to look back on the road behind. After all, its the only road we know. The path ahead tends to be much less clear, and much harder to trust. But we can trust the one behind, the moments of joy we experienced, and this can fill us with hope that the one ahead will be just as beautiful, the sunsets even brighter.
Those who know me know that I live on an undying quest for freedom. But freedom can be found in every moment. Freedom can especially be found in gratitude. I think I’m too quick to get down on myself. I need to take pride in the things I’ve accomplished in a year, of the risks I’ve taken, and for doing it all on my own.
I could be absolutely anywhere one year from now, and that fills me with excitement. Looking forward to the summer ahead!
As if the fact that it has been nearly four months since my last blog post isn’t evidence enough that I did the right thing, I finally sent in my notice for work! This week will be my last at the restaurant. It took me a hella long time to come to this decision, even though I thought I had made up my mind when I was road tripping with my parents (everything is better on the road). I realized why the decision was so hard when I realized that it was about more than money. It was about the stability of work. It was about my anxious brain benefiting from purpose, from someone telling me what to do. It was about feeling productive after a 12 hour shift (and then promptly erasing it from my mind). It was about what its always been about, using constant excuses and distractions to keep me from chasing my potential. Last year it was school and friends. Now it was work. I found myself stuck in exactly the handcuffs I came here to free myself of. I remember craving freedom, for once in my life not having to answer to an institution, a school, a job, a boss, a girlfriend. Despite this, the capitalist subject trades in one pair of handcuffs for another. And most of the time she does so willingly, because the handcuffs can be cozy. They give you a sense of purpose and security. Because really being free is scary. When your hands are chained they can’t do too much. But when they’re free there’s no excuse for what they aren’t doing, no excuse for not building a masterpiece, theres no hiding behind chains.
Having the freedom, the time, no excuses present, to chase your dreams and manifest your goals is scary. Theres so much pressure to succeed. Mostly from yourself, but also from those around you. When you choose to commit to something, fully, you’re taking a huge risk. What it comes down to is fear. Its not about money, its about fear. Of the unknown, of that leap, of failure, of feeling unmotivated and not achieving your goals and dreams. When you’re an entrepreneur, an artist, you make your own purpose. When you work for The Man, you show up, are given tasks, complete them, and go home. When you work for yourself, you make your own tasks, your own schedules. You decide your own hours and goals. You define your own success. You watch the hours drip by, constantly tormented by not having enough time.
I’ve been hiding behind work, school, and other defences; using them as wind blockers. Im proud of myself, albeit a little scared, for having the courage to step out from behind them, and face the wind without excuses, without major distractions, without the fear of being blown away.
I got kinda sad for a minute because I felt like maybe I’m not cut out for the kind of life I thought I wanted, for whatever it is I came here to do. Maybe I’m meant to be boring, maybe I’d be happier that way. But then I was like, nah fuck that. Because I believe in doing things that scare you. If it makes you feel something, its probably a good idea. And I believe in being as risk-oriented as possible. If not now, when?
Not to say I haven’t done anything else since I’ve started working. Look out for some post-dated blog posts about what the last few months of my life have entailed!